Paul's Place ๐Ÿธ๐Ÿบ๐Ÿนโ˜•๐Ÿ๏ธ๐Ÿฉ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ€
 
Welcome...
โ—€๏ธ (Click this picture for a larger view)

The vibe here is relaxed. Take your shoes off...

Potato salad ? ๐Ÿฅ” Cherry Pie ? ๐Ÿ’,
The wine rack, is finally - fully loaded.
... There's beer and some great, Whites...
in the fridge...


Does anyone read blog Main Pages? ย 
.....
. ๐Ÿ˜ถ Good sex is like bridge.
If you don't have a good partner,
you'd better have a good hand.

* Words are like meatloaf - they can be sculpted into any shape you choose. . . . .
(* ยฉApril 2018-19 August Paul P. )
Keywords | Title View | Refer to a Friend |
My Private Mail Box
Posted:Jul 12, 2018 9:41 am
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2019 2:06 pm
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My Private Mail Box ๐Ÿ“ฉ ....
Click Comments , leave a message and check your own Blog Main Page - 'Where I.m Quoted' ... or come back here.
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Sex In The Airport Bathroom... Was A Bad Idea... ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
Posted:Aug 19, 2019 12:44 pm
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2019 10:02 pm
345 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the t.ext. Please be patient.

She was on her way t.o see him. Was it 'love' - she was feeling? The excitement... the anticipation were palpable. Her stomach churned, as the plane landed and finally... taxied to a stop. T.hat familiar chime sounded. She un buckled her seat belt, took a deep breath... and stood up from her seat. "This is it. This might be, the man of m.y dreams," she thought.

He shuffled his feet as he stood and waited. He was, huddled in amongst a throng of others... w.ho also waited. The message board, flashed the words - "Arrived". His heartbeat quickened, as he peered, at the 'Arrivals Gate', sliding doors.

They... had never met.

Of course.... they'd messaged and emailed... and texted. Pictures were exchanged; even those, o.nly adults should s.end. They had talked... on the phone. Weeks... then months passed and finally - they decided t.o meet. He knew, it was going be, a lust filled... steamy weekend. He could tell from her pictures, and the way she spoke ; she probably made love... like a rabbit!

He stood up on his toes, when he saw her walk through the doors, pulling her luggage. He waved his arms, in the air. She glanced left and right and finally seeing him - waved back. Her pace quickened. They both smiled and beamed. They had planned - "the first kiss" and how it would be. He followed t.he plan. He shook her hand, leaned forward and gently pressed his lips... against hers. Then (as scripted) they hugged. It was a worthy squeeze. An embrace which spoke volumes, for what they both felt. T.hat hug... was the last item... on their list . Everything else, was to be - ad libbed.

After their hug... they were both speachless, for a moment. They simply gazed, into each other's eyes... then hugged again.

She was larger, rounder ... than in her pictures. " Much rounder..." he thought.

He was balder and shorter than in his pictures. " Very much shorter..." she thought, as she looked down at him.

After a minute more... he spoke first; almost breathlessly.

"Ya know... I couldn't wait. I took the Viagra before, I left for the airport. I'm hard, as a goddamn rock. I was thinking... I'll check the men's room and if there's no o.ne there, I'll come right o.ut and get you. We can fuck there, first. Ok?"

She looked at him and blinked. Then blinked again... and answered...

"Ya know what? I think I'll pass. I'm just going t.o b.ook a t.icket, back home. It was nice meeting you."

She pushed herself away from him, dropped his hand, turned around... and headed towards the t.icket counter.

He watched... as she hurriedly, walked away. She never looked back. "Typical woman. Another bitch, playing hard to get. What the fuck is her problem?" he thought.

T.he bulge in his pants ached. He shoulda waited, before taking t.hat stupid pill. He strode quickly... and headed into the men's room. There'd be no disappointment... in his right hand.


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Might As Well... Enjoy The Stage... ๐Ÿ˜Š Or Find A Bigger Better One...
Posted:Aug 16, 2019 12:41 am
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2019 12:55 pm
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Note : A F F is deleting words in the t.ext. Ils sont toutes, fuckรฉe. Please be patient.

Last Saturday, I stood under a huge, old, maple tree and wiped the sweat, off my brow. I was about to watch a band, play in a small park... down by the marina.

The sun hadn't set yet. It was still hot and the air was thick. Even the breeze... coming in off the lake... wasn't helping much. I impatiently, looked at my watch. "If the music doesn't start soon , I'm heading, for a cooler place, to hang out," I thought to myself. I'm glad, I waited.

As a musician, I'll listen to music, with a critical ear. But... I'm also, extremely supportive, of young talent, that I see. It took me all, of about a minute - after the band started to play - to figure something out. That stage... was WAY too small... for them.

They , were a five piece, group of young musicians, who's skills, were finely honed. They were tight! What caught my ears, was their smooth and rhythmic style. Don't ask me to describe it. Perhaps... rock, meets jazz, meets reggae... meets Taylor Swift? I know; crazy, right?

Their complex vocals blended, perfectly with the lead and rhythm guitars. Their original tunes drifted seamlessly, between octaves and hauntingly beautiful chord progressions ; aided by the incredible, imagination of the keyboardist. And everything ... was held tightly, in place, with the solid backbone, of a (heart numbing) bass guitarist and... a fucking 'kick ass' drummer.

Sixty or seventy people (a cluster of sedated seniors), sat on folding chairs, in the grass, under the blaze of the setting sun - and listened. Or they tried to. Most fidgeted about; sipping bottled water or boxed juice. Some tapped their feet ; killing ants, perhaps?

I hung around and listened to the band's set. Afterwards, I spoke with some of the band guys... and girl, as they packed up. Turns out, somebody's dad, was on the town's entertainment committee and they called in a favour. They (the band), didn't really give a shit. The crowd and the venue wasn't theirs . But heck... the money was. They smiled, as I commiserated with them and wished them well.

Yeah... sometimes the stage, is just too small. Take this one... for instance. It's beat up and broken and fucked up, all over. Hardly anyone pays attention, to anything... except to the sound... of their own voice. But... you make do and smile... and just take it all in. It's just a place, to practise and blow off some steam; while perfecting, a point of view.

Now... if they, only paid you something. Nope. Ya gotta go, somewhere else... for that.


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38 Comments
Used and Objectified... They Forced Him To Cum... ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
Posted:Aug 13, 2019 12:34 pm
Last Updated:Aug 17, 2019 6:30 am
1666 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the t.ext. Please be patient.As THEY... are f.ucking inept.

If you're, a playful c.ouple in your late twenties and you're amusing yourself, with a drinking game - in a hotel room - in Cleveland; well... shit happens. Doesn't it?

It was ... t.hree or perhaps f.our, in the morning. His girlfriend sat there, in her faded blue jeans and a Mickey Mouse t-shirt. She had that, smug l.ook on her f.ace... as she lay down, the 'Jack of Hearts' and spoke; "You lose. Take them off! I wanna see you run!"

He looked at her sheepishly and peeled off his underwear. He stood there, totally naked... made his way to the door and opened it. THAT ... was the bet. Run up and down the hallway, of the hotel - naked. He gingerly, poked his head. o.ut.

Their room, was right next the elevator. Not a soul... was there. Not a sound... was heard. She scurried up behind him, grabbed his bare ass and pushed him forward. Closing the door behind her, she shoved the key, in her pocket. He was committed. "Go...! " she laughed.

He did. Not at full speed, mind you. There was no o.ne there. His arms flayed in the air, as he laughed and jogged. He felt quite safe. That is... u.ntil he had run, back t.o her. The elevator doors, suddenly opened... and t.wo women, stumbled o.ut ... laughing and joking.

They were older; in their thirties... and nicely dressed, in business attire. Probably... part of that insurance convention, in from Newark. Now... he was trapped... and naked - in front of a cluster of women. He covered his groin, with his hands. His girlfriend, began t.o laugh, as she clutched her f.ace and mouthed the words; "Oh... m.y God."

Those , t.wo elevator women... were primed and frisky. They seemed eager and ready... for the unexpected show. They hooted and laughed and stood there, staring. Then... his girlfriend, did something, unexpected.

Instead of quickly, opening the door and letting him into their room, she chided him with another challenge ; "Dance for them! Dance for them babe - or I won't let you in."

He looked at her and blinked.

Those t.wo women, stood there and waited. He, was getting excited and hard... and even more embarrassed. He looked at his girlfriend and pleaded; "Open the door. Stop messing around. Come on!"

"Nope! Give them a show. Or this door, ain't NEVER , opening," she giggled.

He knew that door wasn't opening. It seemed, that he had no choice : so... he embraced the moment. "What the fuck," he thought, laughing to himself.

He began to dance... slowly, at first. The women stared, at his now - rock hard cock and smiled broadly. Then as all of them encouraged him with clapping (and cat calls from his girlfriend), he sped things up. He flung his hips side to side. His rigid dick, flung left to right and up and down. They laughed, in even greater appreciation.

"Let them TOUCH you babe. Let them grab your cock. Touch him ladies. He'll let you, " his grilfriend suddenly, exclaimed.

The blond haired woman (with the pony tail and dark rimmed glasses), looked at his girlfriend (in the Mickey Mouse t-shirt) and paused, as if to say ; "R.eally? Can I touch him?" She boldly, stepped forward and eagerly, grabbed his cock. The other woman (the dark haired, tall o.ne), joined her and began t.o tease his balls.

Before he knew it, he was pushed up against the dark walls of the hallway, as t.wo women (on their knees), fondled and played with him. By that time, HE had become... Completely shameless. He thrust his hips forward. Gently and slowly (at first), they stroked his cock up and down and squeezed and teased his balls, with their long nails. They smiled lustfully, as they explored him.

He had lost... all sense of where he was. When the blond woman, began playing with the precum, dripping from the head of his cock, he looked towards his girlfriend. She playfully, blew him a kiss.

That duo of women, took turns stroking his cock up and down... and up and down. He felt that familiar feeling, creeping up. Waves of pleasure, numbed his mind. Every nerve of his body, tingled. His cock throbbed and twitched, as each woman's hands... warmed him and took him closer and closer, to that point of no return.

They swirled their fingers around, his throbbing, purple glans. Even more precum dribbled o.ut of that slit in his dick. They teased it's wetness with breezes of their breath. Coming so close t.o the head... he could feel the heat, from their lips.

Wave after wave of pleasure, filled him, as those t.wo strangers.... brought him closer t.o the edge. He had no choice and no control. They were forcing him t.o cum. He'd given himself up t.o them and t.o the feeling, sweeping his body. His legs began t.o quiver and his eyes closed. Finally... his cock burst forward, in those familiar, rhythmic spasms.

He moaned and gasped over... and over again. The women, laughed with glee. As the last shivers, left his body, the dark haired woman, admired the white sticky, liquid on her hands and released him. He stood there, spent... leaning up against the wall... still hard ; dripping and throbbing.

Those t.wo ladies... stood up, a.nd thanked his girlfriend, for the great treat. Then, they gently kissed him, squeezed his wet... and twitching cock, o.ne last time... and waved goodnight. They were still laughing and giggling, as they entered their room.

His girlfriend... turned and opened up the door, t.o their room. She hoped... HE, had something.... left in him. She still, had plans for him. She - was wet and f.ucking horny, as hell !


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So...
Can men be objectified; meant t.o feel cheap and , u.sed as sex objects?
Is THAT... the feeling... women might feel?

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54 Comments
A Woman... And Her Orgasm... A Sight To See... ๐Ÿ˜Š
Posted:Aug 8, 2019 12:25 pm
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2019 4:29 pm
2789 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the t.ext. Please be patient.

He had slowly... taken her clothes off. He'd made sure to kiss... every bit, of bare skin... he had exposed. She lay naked, on the bed and waited for him. He was fully clothed and sat down, near her feet.

She spread her legs, as his finger tips, feathered, the edges of her. She sensed her arousal growing, in lunging waves. A tingling, filled her body, with a deep longing - as she thrust her hips forward. He refused her offer and brushed his wrist, along her inner thigh... instead. She could feel the heat... from his hand.

"Oh... for fucks sake ! Touch me there," she shouted, in her mind; almost pleading. A soft moan... escaped, from her lips.

He knew, that blood was flowing... furiously... to that spot of hers. He watched with fascination as it quivered... just a tiny bit. It puckered and twitched, almost as if - it had, a mind of its own. A silky wetness, had pooled, at the opening to her vessel. He played with it. A ribbon of her liquid... formed a thin thread... as he stretched it, away from her.

She could feel herself swelling. THAT part of her, ached... and that pleasurable pain, filled her with anticipation. Her legs began to tremble, as she propped them up, against his shoulders.

He could see her clit draw tightly up against her pelvic bone, and grow firm. The sheath of skin protecting that part of her... had peeled away. She revealed herself to him and he rewarded her. He kneeled forward and with a soft lick of his tongue, watched her reaction. She threw her head back, deep, into the pillow.

"Oh my God. Yes! Continue!" she thought.

She felt, the volcanic heat of his mouth, wrap itself around, that button of hers. Then... she felt fingers... slide inside her. Stars filled her closed eyes, as sparkles tickled her brain. Her hips, thrust towards him again, as she clutched his head tightly, against her.

His long fingers, magically reached a spot ... hidden within her. He massaged it, with deft efficiency. "I won't last long," she thought... as she moaned again.

"She won't last long," he thought to himself, as he increased the speed and intensity of his thrusts. His tongue played expertly with her. He could feel her whole body tense and he knew.

She could feel herself giving up. She surrendered herself, completely, to him and to those familiar feelings. They rushed towards her, in wave after wave of increasing pleasure. She moaned again... and bit her lip.

He knew she was peaking. He would bring her over the edge, with one last swirl of his fingers; one last lick, with his tongue.

Her orgasm was intense, as she uttered a deep growl and released a loud moan. Her legs closed like a vice grip, around his head. She pushed his face, even tighter into her. Her hips bucked... high, off the bed.

He managed to pull his head away, while keeping his fingers inside her. He could see the cycle, of rhythmic contractions, as her vaginal muscles, squeezed his fingers. Her sticky fluid... flowed out of her... and down his hand. She gasped for air... as he, continued to ply his digits... gently... inside her.

Eventually... she opened her eyes; out of breath... and flushed with colour. She grasped his head and pulled him to her... and kissed him... passionately. She could taste herself, on his lips... as she smiled slyly and spoke...

"Take your fucking clothes off. It's your turn..."


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So...
Have you ever had an orgasm? Or given one?
๐Ÿ˜ถ

Bonus Question : How's your summer going?

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77 Comments
One Thousand Five Hundred Reasons... THAT Boat... Was Sexy... ๐Ÿ˜Š
Posted:Aug 6, 2019 12:08 pm
Last Updated:Aug 15, 2019 3:21 pm
2804 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the t.ext. Please be patient.

Life ... is where you find it, right? I found an interesting, slice of it... down by the marina, last Saturday morning.

It was sunny. A few clouds in the sky. I pulled into my favorite spot, slid out of my car and stood, by the edge of the wharf. I inhaled, that invigorating fishy scent... of fresh, lake air. It always, soothed my soul. The waves were timid and the breeze was warm. Nearby, a cluster of hopeful fishermen, sat in folding chairs and clutched their rods. The horizon, was dotted with tiny sail boats, fluttering about. And behind me, a gaggle of sailors, scurried, to ready their crafts.

Brian and Linda were working on their 2005, 'Sea Ray' - securing it to the trailer. Theirs - was a sleek, white and blue vessel, built for water skiing and skimming, along calm waters. Brian, had just sold it. He'd taken 'her' out ... one, last time. He wiped the chrome rail... as he spoke to me. "I'm gonna miss this baby. She was never good, in rough water though. Her keel is too flat. We'd bounce off the waves, like a rubber ball, off cement," he laughed.

As we stood there - 'One Armed Warren' - drove up. His right arm, was lost in a bizarre, boating accident... many years ago. I never got, the full story. He slowly, backed up his truck, down the loading ramp. The trailer, carried his 'Larson Bowrider'. That boat, was a sea worthy, twenty five foot beast. "I've taken her , on the Atlantic. She'll handle any wave," he proudly boasted to me, once.

It's always a bit tricky, to unload a boat, so Brian and I... offered our help. As Warren slipped the stern of his boat, into the water, and unhitched it, Brian called out to him. "Warren... Ya gonna start the motor, before you release? Test it?"

"Nah. Runs fine Brian. Just came back from the Florida Keys. She'll be good."

I don't know much, about boats. Brian does. He looked at me and shrugged his shoulders. With the next lurch of the trailer... Warren's boat... floated gently, onto the water. Brian and I held the ropes, as Waren jumped in, to start the engine. Yes...! You predicted correctly. It wouldn't start.

After another futile, twenty minutes... it still, wouldn't start. Warren, hopped out of the 'captain's chair' and onto the dock.

"Sea water in the engine. I thought I flushed it. But something's messing, with the fuel pump... or filter. Can't reach it, without dismantling half the engine. I'm fucked... for today," he declared, rather annoyed with himself.

I could see Eileen (Warren's wife), trudging towards us, from the marina clubhouse. "What's up Warren?" she called. "Don't tell me - we're not going out?"

"No... The fuel pump is messed up," he replied.

Then... we ALL heard, that familiar sound, rolling in from the far end of the lake.

Twin engines roared, from about a mile away. The 'cigarette boat', flew across the lake. It threw a huge wall of water and misty spray, high into the air... and far behind... in its wake. It was Barry and his - fifteen hundred horsepower - monster! The music (blasting through his speakers)... preceded his entry, to the side of the wharf. His engines idled, with that intimidating... deep... low growl. Heads turned. I could feel my body vibrating... as he finally, killed them (the engines)... and floated towards us.

"Hey guys. What's up?" Barry called out, as he waved. We shared with him, the 'short version' of our morning. And before we knew it, we were all climbing into... Barry's sexy, racing sloop. The engines, rumbled to life. The sound system clicked in and the sub woofers, teased our heartbeats. We gripped the seats and then... ripped across the blue waves at (what felt like), a hundred miles per hour.

Sometime later... after the wind and the brilliant sun, had completely, numbed our bodies... and the music, had totally numbed our ears; we all sat there, in the marina lounge, watching the boats slip in and out of the bay. Drinks were soon - going to be numbing ... our brains.

I'm not a fan, of big boats and motorized water craft. When I'm sitting peacefully, on a chair, by the shore, I find they're intrusive and obnoxiously LOUD. Not to mention, their impact, on the environment.

But damn... they're FUN ... when you're on one! Who wouldn't, enjoy it? Or... is the love of speed... just a 'guy thing' ?


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Guitar Blues... ๐Ÿ˜Ž Or Hunting Down... A Sexual Craving...๐Ÿค”
Posted:Aug 1, 2019 12:34 pm
Last Updated:Aug 10, 2019 4:08 pm
6135 Views
I met that famous 'Chicago blues' - singer and guitarist - Muddy Waters , once... (in a tiny bar), in 'old town' , Montreal. It was nineteen eighty two... on a really chilly, November night.

That bar, was a dark, grundgy... beaten down place. Thick, grey stone walls, supported wide, wooden beams, while a black painted ceiling - tried to hide the cracks. Smoke filled the room and lay thick, above our heads. It hovered, in billowing waves, through the white, spot lights. About fifty people, sat, around small, wobbly wooden tables and listened, to a guitarist and his three piece band - blow the blues ... right off, the planet.

I was surprised to find myself, sitting at a spot, right in front of the stage. I watched sweat, form beads, on the forehead of that guitarist, as he sang. I thought, he might have looked at me, a couple of times, and smiled. It was a sad smile... as he played, in front of, that half empty, room. None the less - it was an epic set! A bunch, of special minutes - etched forever, into my brain. I left, after that first set.

Many years later, I found out who he was. I realized, I'd missed out, on a world icon, of music. But, I was and ... and definitely, impatient. And... there were no women, in that club... where he played.

There were no women, anywhere I went... on that night. None I met, at least. Well... there was one ; but she was, waaay... outta my league! Yeah... I just bounced, from place, to place and club to club... aimlessly looking. When I think about it now... I know. I should have stayed, at that tiny grundgy bar, in 'Old Montreal' and enjoyed, that second set. McKinley Morganfield ( Muddy Waters), never played in this city, again. He died in April, nineteen eighty three.

Sometimes, ya gotta take what life gives you. more patient these days... You?

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Sexual Addiction...๐Ÿ˜ฎ A True Affliction... Or Just A Fake Ailment... ๐Ÿค”
Posted:Jul 29, 2019 1:19 pm
Last Updated:Aug 10, 2019 4:10 pm
6951 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the text. Please be patient.

Addictions ... they can ruin lives. So when *FrankeeZee confided in me and admitted he had a dependancy issue... I was concerned. When he told me he was addicted to sex and was going into rehab - I told him, to fuck off .

Now... before you start judging me, ya have to understand something. I rarely , believe FrankeeZee - regardless of what he says. He's fooled me or... just stretched the truth, so many times before. I mean... let's f.ace it - is sexual addiction , an actual ailment?

Heroin, alcohol... anti depressants - I get it! Addicted t.o the pursuit of orgasms , with the opposite sex? Highly questionable - in my opinion. I decided, t.o read up on it.

Turns o.ut, some psychologists agree with me. It IS , a fake addiction. More of an obsession than a dependancy. On the other hand... a fair n.umber of doctors - certify t.hat 'sex addiction', is a serious problem.

FrankeeZee went to a well known, beach resort, 'rehab camp' and remained there, for four weeks. He came back last Saturday. I picked him up at the airport and immediately, noticed a change. FrankeeZee was sooo calm; so relaxed. He was (I thought) , a changed man .

"Ya know Paul... I feel, like a changed man," he declared. "I'm grateful, I was able to get treatment."

"Good to have you back Frankee," I replied, while giving my buddy a strong hug.

We sat sat there in the airport lounge... drinking coffee and just catching up on things... the way friends would. FrankeeZee fiddled with his phone and pushed it towards me.

"Here Paul. This is a picture of the rehab people , w.ho were with me. Ya know what? We became ... r.eally really close," Frankee admitted, as he choked up.

I looked at Frankee's picture. It was a shot, of about, t.en o.f them, on the beach. FrankeeZee had his arms around the waist, of a woman. His monstrous hard-on , cast a large shadow, along his shorts... as he grinned, into the lens. I looked at FrankeeZee... and blinked.

"So... I guess... they kicked you outta camp, right Frankee?" I asked the question, but I already knew, the answer.

"Y.ep ... they kicked me o.ut Me... and that l.ady . Hey... I woulda made it. I woulda graduated. But that woman and I, ended up, being tied together ... in the t.hree legged races, on Family Day . Fucked things up... completely. And then... I had a relapse . Many relapses... a.ctually ," FrankeeZee replied, while smiling... sadly.

I sat there and shook my head. I had t.o admit... that the 'Rehab Lady' , in Frankee's picture, was h.ot! I imagine, it was like putting a bottle of scotch, next t.o an alcoholic. Let's f.ace it - unless an addict wants t.o change, do they have any hope, of rehabilitation? Any chance at all?

FrankeeZee's phone buzzed - incoming t.ext. I looked at the image on the screen - it was that , Rehab Lady .

FrankeeZee... had NO chance.


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So...
Do you think sex , can be an addiction?
What things (besides A F F) are you 'addicted'
t.o?

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32 Comments
Ever Been... Wrapped Up In Your Thoughts... And Sat There... Naked ๐Ÿค”
Posted:Jul 26, 2019 8:31 am
Last Updated:Aug 11, 2019 6:23 pm
10856 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the text. Please be patient.

Have you ever been, wrapped up in your thoughts? Have you ever sat there (perhaps naked, like I was), in a favorite chair or one that's comfortable... and wondered; What if, things would be different, today?

I'm not talking about your regrets or about, second guessing yourself. I'm not talking about, beating yourself up, over some decision you made. I'm just talking about, different . Today!

Different house. Different car. Different friends. A different city or town and maybe even, different country? Perhaps a different or cat or... can I say - ? A different lover, wife or husband. I don't know. I'm not sure... exactly. You know what I mean?

I'm just talking, about different . Like asking her , if she'd... untie these ropes.


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So....
Ever have one of those days where... you just THINK too much?
๐Ÿค” ๐Ÿ˜€
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43 Comments
Things Men Can Do...๐Ÿ˜Š That Women... Can Only Dream Of... ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
Posted:Jul 22, 2019 12:27 pm
Last Updated:Jul 25, 2019 8:09 pm
13362 Views
Note : A F F is deleting words in the . Please be patient.

Do you recall a recent blog post (by superbjversion2), titled - 'Penis Envy'? I did... as I stood there, holding my dick. I thought hard; about women and the answer, to THAT, question. I wasn't positive, if all ladies envied, what I held. But, I had a feeling...

I was dining, at an Italian restaurant, in Montreal's east end. It was Sunday afternoon and (as things went along), I stepped into the men's room : it was, a fancy place. I could tell... as soon as I cozied up to the urinal and pulled out my little friend. Looking down (as men are apt to do), I noticed a mound of crushed ice (piled ), the bottom of that portal. THAT'S how we men, recognize - we're in a classy spot!

There's a certain... cool, freshness, about the whole event ; when ice is involved. Then of course, there are those little games, men can play; as we melt, tiny tunnels, or spell our names, into that frozen, slush. Yet... it was when I looked up, that I truly ... applauded, the style of that space.ย 

Above the urinal, was a wide screen TV . Roger Federer and Novak Djokovic, were playing in the Wimbledon Finals , tennis match. There I was, pissing into ice - watching tennis history, unfold.

Does it get, any better, than that ? (Picture me, with a sheepish grin.)

I had no idea, that the tennis match, would last, five hours . I was a little tired, standing there... at the end. The restaurant staff, refreshed the ice for me... twice.ย 

So.... would women, have enjoyed their time, in that bathroom? Do they have 'penis envy' - as Freud suggested? I don't know. More than likely, they just have - a very serious... craving ... for one!

But I betcha, everyone (here reading), wants one of those wide screen TVs and a bucket of ice in their home bathroom, right? ๐Ÿค” And perhaps, a mini fridge, in the corner... with a microwave oven - over by the wall. Oh and... throw in some mood lighting and a decent sound system... ๐Ÿ˜Š

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26 Comments
A Fly On The Wall... Watching - Instant Karma... ๐Ÿ˜‰
Posted:Jul 18, 2019 12:26 pm
Last Updated:Aug 17, 2019 6:29 am
15274 Views
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A fly on the wall... or... a 'Paul' on the curb? They both... see... and hear things. The fly, has wings. Paul (that's me)... waited... for the valet, to deliver his car.

Standing next to me, was a handsome, well dressed, young man. He nodded and smiled. We both waited, for our cars. I'd just stepped out of that 'Thai' restaurant, behind me. The meal, was fabulously authentic; if you know what I mean. It was - salty and sweet... and sour and spicy. Really spicy! But I liked it like that.

A beautiful, young woman, draped in a fitted black dress, sauntered closer and joined our queue. She flashed, a radiant smile and gave another valet, her ticket. He, scurried off.

The young man (next to me), turned and spoke, to that young woman.

"Great meal, wasn't it? This place deserves its reputation... no?" he remarked.

She nodded her head. "I thought it was fantastic. I wish my boyfriend had felt the same. He didn't like it. I blew a wad of cash here - its his birthday. And he's in the bathroom, throwing up... half the bill," she replied while laughing. "He lied to me, about liking spicy food," she'd stopped laughing. Tears welled up, in her dark, smokey eyes.

Taken aback, by her honesty and vulnerability, the young man, spoke again. "Don't feel bad. My girlfriend, is doing the EXACT, same thing - in the lady's room. She couldn't stand , this place. She never stopped complaining."

The young woman, wiped the tears from her eyes and laughed nervously. "Really? I loved the meal. I made reservations, months ago. I had to save weeks, for this night. He told me he wants to try different foods. No matter where we go... he fucking hates it."

"He sounds exactly , like my girlfriend. I can't take her anywhere," the young man replied. "Maybe... we should hook up, your guy and my girl ," he continued while laughing. "You should have heard what she told me, when I asked her to go sky diving with me..." and he laughed again.

The young woman perked up and spoke. "Sky diving? Are you serious? I'd love to go sky diving. I've been asking my boyfriend when WE can go. He told me; 'When Hell freezes over', " she shrugged her shoulders and smiled sadly.

And with that tiny shrug, the conversation ended. There were no 'goodbyes'. The valets had arrived. Their dates, stepped out of the restaurant and into, their respective cars.

I stood there and then watched something, completely unexpected.

That handsome young man -bumped - the car, of THAT beautiful young woman. It was a nudge, that was hardly worth noticing - but I did. So did, both drivers. He immediately, opened his door and began apologizing profusely. She, was already walking, toward her rear bumper. The young man, promised to pay for any damage, he had caused. There was none , to see.

I watched, as he gave her a paper with his name and number on it. I watched, as she touched his hand and took it from his fingers... and folded it into her purse. I watched, as they smiled at each other. And then... they drove away.

I stood at the curb and realized what I'd just witnessed. Damn...! I am not sure, if I would have had the imagination , to try THAT.

The valet spoke. "Sir. Sir...? Your car..."

I wish... I could be a fly on the wall... next time, those two meet.


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So...
How did YOU meet your ; wife, husband, lover, girlfriend, boyfriend, dentist... or dance instructor?


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37 Comments
Being A Famous A F F Celebrity Blogger...๐Ÿ˜Ž Is Not Easy... It Is Hard... ๐Ÿค”
Posted:Jul 15, 2019 10:44 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2019 10:57 pm
16687 Views
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Being a famous - A F F Celebrity Blogger - is not easy. I'm constantly being recognized and hounded for autographs and selfies... wherever I go. Take last weekend...

Now I'll admit... I don't really mind. I mean... if I can help motivate someone, to achieve their life goals, then so be it. As a role model (for some), I am always aware, of the standard I'm setting. My "dick pics" (for example) - are for Friends only! So... I sat there in the restaurant, taking tiny bites of food, wiping my mouth, quickly. I wasn't at all surprised, when THEY, approached me.

Their cell phone cameras were at the ready; paper and pens in hand. I put my knife and fork down, in anticipation of the inevitable gawking. I expected their gushing requests, for proof and confirmation - of their brush, with a. r.eal, live, superstar... and famous person . Then... to my complete surprise, they walked right by, MY table and trudged quickly, to the group seated behind me.

"What the fuck?"; were my first thoughts... until I turned around and realized who, was sitting behind me.

He was leaning on his elbows, a mouthful of grilled salmon sticking outta his mouth. Tartar sauce clung to the edges of his lips and his fingers were smeared with butter. It was Captain Kirk -William Shatner. 'Comic-Con' was in town at the Convention Center and he was there for the festivities.

Hmmm... I Waited until that silly cluster of people, had left Captain Kirk's table, before I turned back in my chair and asked him to sign my napkin.

Never presume! Life will always surprise you with the unexpected. I wore my sunglasses for the balance of my meal. I hoped no one, would recognize me. No one , did.


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So...
Are there any valid role models, out there... these days?

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43 Comments
I Was Relieved... ๐Ÿ˜Š When She Came... ๐Ÿ˜ƒ
Posted:Jul 11, 2019 12:14 pm
Last Updated:Aug 9, 2019 3:38 am
23269 Views
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The incessant buzz , of an air conditioner and the uninterrupted rattle , of the Coke machine - had numbed my brain. A beep warned me, my phone, was slowly dying. I closed it. The charger, was in the trunk of my car. My car, was in the repair shop. The repair shop waiting room, was where I sat. I sat there ... alone .

I looked around. An assortment of magazines, were scattered about, on a table. I picked one up ( 'Popular Science' ) and randomly, turned to an article ; 'Electric Cars... The Future Is Coming'. It was written in 2.0.0.7. "Alrighty... Let's try something else," I thought, as I picked up another.

'Time Magazine'... "Ahhh... they always, have stuff, that's interesting." I flipped to a piece titled ; 'Will Trump, Beat Hillary?'. Somehow... I already knew the answer, to that question. There was a dusty old phone book, on one of the shelves. I hadn't read a phone book in years, but I recalled the plot. I let it be. At that moment, she came ... into my waiting room and sat down. I was relieved... Someone to talk with... perhaps?

She was attractive... and smiled brightly at me. I smiled back and welcomed her, with an original question ;"Fixing your car?"

"Beklager. Jeg snakker ikke engelsk. Jeg er fra Norge," she replied while raising her hands and furrowing her eyebrows.

She didn't speak English. I don't speak, Norwegian.

I sat there, almost alone... and waited.

I counted... the fucking grimy, greasy, faded yellow... floor tiles. Five hundred and ninety four...


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So...
Where are your WORST places, to wait? ๐Ÿค”


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51 Comments

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